


The Magic of Cookies

by wraith17



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Could be viewed as a prequel to Babysitting, F/M, Gen, drug references, pre twissy, random shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-03-09 09:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3244280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wraith17/pseuds/wraith17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They are just innocent little cookies, they don't have any magical properties.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Magic of Cookies

"Those cookies were amazing." Missy giggles and sloppily kisses the Doctor, her little fingers fumbling to undo his jacket while his slid around her waist.

"We should have sex." She slurs slight when she pulls back from him, giggling again like she just said something hilarious.

The Doctor just nods enthusiastically and starts undressing her too. Jacket, skirt, blouse and corset all being flung around her console room just leaving her in a pretty pair of lace knickers.

"Pretty." He murmurs and nuzzles into her hair sniffing deeply and pulling the pins out and shaking out her hair for her. It falls to her lower back and down over her chest, framing her face and hiding her breasts. He kisses her again, now only in his underwear when they pull apart and Missy squeals.

"Look! The colours are dancing!"

"Whow, we, we should catch it!"

"How?"

"Your knickers can work as a clever net. Here gimme."

As Missy giggles and reaches to lower her knickers Clara walks into the room.

"Doctor! Missy! What the bloody hell are you doing? Keep your clothes on!"

And by some miracle Missy obeys but stares at Clara with glassy eyes.

"But Clara, my Clara. We need them to catch the pretty fireflies."

Clara tries to get out of Missy's tight hug to no avail, Time Lords were stronger then humans, and just allows her to cling like a limpet, trying to ignore that Missy's naked breasts were pressing into her back.

"Doctor, what have you done?"

"Me? Why me?" He sniffles. "Me own Impossible Girl doesn't believe me."

"Because Doctor, you are both clearly high as kites and I would bet that it has something to do with that plate of cookies you wouldn't let me touch."

"It would've killed you, your just a baby anyway. Too young for drugs, how are you walking anyway? Shouldn't you be in your crib?" He gasps with delight. "Missy, our baby is growing up. Look at her standing on two legs!"

Missy looks up and then plants a big wet kiss firmly on Clara's lips who looks more than a little disturbed by it. "Oh, look at my baby. So beautiful and all grown up." She coos and nuzzles against Clara like a cat.

"Doctor, Missy I'm not your child. More than half the time I swear it's the other way round."

"Uh oh, Doctor. Mummy is angry with us."

He whimpers and sits down, flopping onto his back. Missy rushes over to him, tripping and falling on top of him, the two Time Lords giggling and nuzzling each other.

"Come on you two, I can't just leave you here."

"Yessssssss, join us!" Missy cries out and just like that Clara is the human in a Time Lord sandwich. She isn't sure what is worse, the nuzzling and butterfly kisses or that they keep trying to have sex on top of her.

After a while, they distract themselves with her, both petting, stroking and playing with Clara's hair, on Missy's side it's all a bunch of braids. They coo over all the colours and ask her questions like why was there an elephant? and how did she make her eyes so big?

Finally, mercifully both of them fall asleep, Missy curled up against her side, hugging her arm like a teddy bear, her face buried in her neck, looking very peaceful and cute. The Doctor is more sprawled out next to her, one arm over her waist and his fingers entwined with Missy's. Clara thinks it's sad that he had to get high before he could work up the courage to show the Time Lady how he feels but Clara has known for a long time that despite their apparent genius Time Lords were idiots. But these two were her idiots so with that in mind, Clara just lies back and listens to the TARDIS's humming laughter eagerly awaiting the moment they would awaken sober and be awkward turtles with each other; burning cheeks, fidgeting fingers and shamed glances at the other. While it would be fun initially, she also didn't want to have two heartssick Time Lords on her hands so perhaps Clara the Cupid would need to dust of her bow. The Doctor is her best friend and she would see him happy, even if that was with Missy. One thing Clara did know for certain, they had better name their first child after her that's for damn sure.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, dreamy. You strike again.


End file.
